I got my Grad Dress back from being altered and I am so happy with it!!

He said

Unbeknownst to Emelia for the most part this week the focus has been on Emelia’s big day on Tuesday. For the most part her 14th year has been a shit-show to put it mildly. We have spent the year with a global pandemic which has basically squelched most of her social interaction away. Anyone who remembers their foray into the teen years knows just how deep that can cut. Mind you, Emelia has been a real trooper about it and while she’s had her expected moments of frustration, there has been a lot of understanding and adapting on her part. And, I can’t say I would have done better, and am pretty sure I might have done worse.

She had hoped that school might go back in time such that she could at least spend her birthday with her friends mask-to-mask at a distance of six feet of course. But, ever the pragmatist, Emelia told me she knew it wouldn’t happen. And this week, we got that confirmation—homeschooling will continue until the 10th of February… at least. Again, did she like that answer? No. But, did she find a way to move on from the bummer and make the best of it? Yes. That has been the thing that I am continually amazed by—her ability to move on and figure it out. Now we do have some special things planned to make her feel better about it, but that she’ll just have to wait and find out.

One of the things that I have loved through this pandemic, and especially as of late is how the bond between Danielle and Emelia has gotten closer. The whole house has embraced healthier living with workouts and we juggle time and space in the basement on the equipment, but the one thing that Danielle and Emelia have found they enjoy is going on long walks together outside. As much as the fresh air and getting outside is great for them, it is more about how much Emelia opens up with Danielle as she works through problems, worries and thoughts about the little woman she is becoming. And one of the things that has surfaced in these walks is Twenty Questions, but I will let Danielle tell you about that.

Tuesday is the big day that Emelia officially moves from 13 to 14. It is a very big year for her: graduation from grade school, moving over to high school, and really the year where you begin the journey to becoming who you are. And we have seen a lot of the maturity and thought from her – especially in the last six or so months as she navigates some very real and mature obstacles. We couldn’t be prouder of the woman she is becoming. And it is funny because I know I have often said here that life with her has been this duplicitous adventure of feeling like it’s flying by so fast and yet feels like longer than any other 14 year stretch of my life. She still will always be the little girl that would laugh at my ridiculousness—even now when she rolls her eyes so hard I think they may roll out of her head.

Emelia, I love you to the end of time and back and want you to know just how special and much more complete you made our lives—your Mother and I. Thank you for figuring out the person you want to be and for the part we get to play in that. And thank you for being fierce when you need to be, caring when you know you should and above all else being more courageous than you give yourself credit for. You are far more beautiful, smart and outstanding than you ever give yourself credit for. My only hope is that one day you understand and trust what we see is what the world thinks too.

Love you, and Happy Fourteenth Birthday,

Fah-zha

She said

This week I have been quietly focusing on a special surprise for Emelia for her birthday. Emelia’s 13th year has been a shit show. She has battled her mental health and come out the other side stronger, more secure and much happier.

Because of Covid lockdowns Emelia isn’t able to have any sort of birthday party with her family and friends so we wanted to bring the special people in her life to her. Over the last week or so we have been collecting special messages from the people who have been in her life. We’re putting the finishing touches on that tomorrow. We have collected most of the videos and cannot wait to show her on her birthday on Tuesday. What we love is to see how many people sent videos in to let Emelia know how special she is. We are so touched by all the messages!

This week we will try and make sure Emelia feels special. Tomorrow night she and I are going to bake her birthday cake, prep some requested decorations for the house and prepare her requested birthday dinner—which will be Taco Tuesday!!! We are hoping that in spite of this year she can look back on her 14th birthday and know she was surrounded by love and support of the people that have come to love her.

We have been trying our best to make the most out of a not great situation, we are 3 weeks into lockdown and we are doing out best to be positive and spend time together. One thing I love so much is that Emelia asks to go for a long walk in nature for a few hours a day on the weekends. I adore this time with her, she opens up to me, talks about her biggest fears and triumphs. Another game she has been loving lately is our own version of 20 questions, it has been expanded to discussions about her feelings about the pandemic, her future, her dreams and what she has learnt about herself over the last 10 months. She is so in-tune now to her emotions, her inner power and drive for her future. I am still amazed how far she has come since even the summer and how strong she has become as a person.

We are so proud of you Emelia, the strong person you are, we know your future is limitless. We love you so much my love with all our hearts. Happy 14th Birthday Emelia. Love mama and daddy xoxox